by on March 9, 2012 Leave a Comment

Analyze your Problems and Solve Them

There are times when you worry about real problems. And when this happens you do have to analyze your problems and solve them too. The best way to solve a problem that is worrying you is to accept it as it is and be prepared for the worst. If you are afraid of losing your job and being unemployed with no one to support you, then scrutinize the basis for this worry. Are you giving your best performance? Are you sincere in your work? If you are satisfied on these two points then see what can happen if you really lose your job? How long will it take you to get another? Can you be self-employed or do some business? There is never a situation that cannot be set right when handled properly.

When you are prepared for the worst it relieves your mind of all tension. Nothing worse can happen you know and you can now work backwards from the worst that could happen. Every alternative will now look brighter than the worst and the chances of the worst happening are limited, you know. And when you are prepared for the worst you have hope, and when you have hope you do not worry. You work on solutions, not problems.

It is always a good idea to work towards solving your problem, not fighting with it, fuming over it, or brooding about it. Question yourself if it is really as important as you are making it out to be. Will it matter a year from now? What are the chances of it happening? Ninety per cent of the time people worry over things that never happen; it is only a waste of time and energy. Worry is one of the chief reasons why people are not able to accomplish what they want to, and enjoy it if they do.

I have never yet met a healthy person who worried very much about his health, or a really good person who worried much about his soul. — J.B.S. HALDANE

After you learn to keep worry away you can now devote your time to solving your problems without anxiety. After all you have accepted the worst and it is not so bleak, you can handle it and come out of it. The world will not come to a standstill you know, and, whatever may happen be able to be dealt with, that too you know. You have planned and prepared for the consequences, whatever they may be. And in all likelihood they will be better than what you have planned for.

Fatigue also makes a person susceptible to worry. A fatigued mind cannot have patience and think rationally. Fatigue lowers your resistance to negative emotions of fear and anxiety and triggers the circuit of worry. You go round and round in your agonizing thoughts and find it difficult to break free from them.

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by on March 9, 2012 1 Comment

Problems are Inevitable-Worry is Optional

Do Not Let Problems Overwhelm You Learn to Relax

Nobel Prize winning doctor ALEXIS CARREL has said, ‘Those who do not know how to fight worry die young.’  Worry is enemy number one of happiness and sound health. It is one of the biggest problems facing mankind today and is also the most difficult to understand and to get rid of. It is the cause of more ills than any other known reason. It shows on our face, robs us of our good night’s sleep, our healthy appetite, gives us heart attacks, ulcers, headaches, shortness of breath, back spasms and what not. It has the potential to make our life hell and a torture to be alive. Worry can have such a vicious grip over us that once we get into the habit of worrying, it becomes difficult for us to get out of it. A worried person can never be happy.

To worry is to be anxious, fearful, apprehensive, nervous, troubled and disturbed about something. The cause of our worry can be a real problem facing us, or an imaginary problem that we anticipate coming our way. When we worry, we think only of our problems, not their solutions. Our problems get magnified manifold, much out of proportion, and we feel helpless. Worry destroys our ability to concentrate and think rationally. When we worry we go in circles thinking of our problems and what they might do to us. Worry aggravates them.

Worry affects the circulation — the heart, the glands, the whole nervous system. I have never known a man who died of overwork, but many who died
from doubt. — DR CHARLES MAYO

One thing typical about worry is that it need not have a basis; it comes from nowhere and is uncontrollable. It generates tension and is not open to reason. When you worry one set of problems leads to another and yet another and then back again. You get nowhere to finding any solution to your problems. The worrier does not know in which case his worry is genuine and where it is imaginary. Reality and imagination get mixed up. He gets trapped in a circuit of worry where he goes round and round in his anxiety producing thoughts and is unable to control them. Instead of coming up with solutions he stays focused on his problems and what they might lead to. This serves no purpose. It only saps his energy and produces fatigue, both emotional and physical. Problems have solutions; worries don’t.

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by on February 15, 2012 Leave a Comment

Childhood Stress

As long as the child stays at home and enjoys parental love, care and affection, when his reasonable demands and needs are met, he is not likely to face any problem, so to say. This situation demands only a caring affection. But, when sense of neglect creeps in, the young one exhibits his stressful state by rejecting whatever is offered, throwing away articles, disobeying even orders. He refuses to eat, demand things which are beyond the reach of parents. The situation worsens when he has lost his parents and nothing is made available to him even if just and reasonable.
Since the child is dependent upon his caretakers, he can resist for a short while only. When stress cannot be expressed by way of normal behavior or demands an implicit repugnance develops, when he chooses to remain away from home, skip school classes, steal things, fall into bad company or even fall into the trap of wayward classmates or antisocial elements. He may imbibe bad habits. His behavior would be offensive and repelling. Such neglected children prefer to stay away from home, for most of the time, than to say at home where they are neglected and humiliated.
When a child is reprimanded, insulted or rebuked, or even bashed up in the presence of his friends, relatives and others, he will either be offensive or else evade company at home. The young one is too immature to realize the effects of his behavior. He needs to be treated with care, love affection and assurance.
It may be remembered that whenever any child shows withdrawn, agitated, angry and offensive behaviors, it should be immediately construed that he has been over taken by stress. Certain parents show utmost imprudence when they either start. Treating him too harshly or start pampering him. He is not mature enough to ventilate his grievances but he often expresses has displeasure by way of odd and unusual behavior which must, at once, be regarded as an alarming bell for by the parents. A child cannot be preached and sermonized but can be won over by an extra dose of care, affection, love and attachment. It is not good to publicly denounce and demean a child nor should he be expected to show wisdom of an adult. You cannot reform a wayward, nasty, and obstinate child by iron discipline but can surely bring him round by sympathetic persuasion.
If a child suffers from stress at the young age, it will recoil on him throughout his life as childhood impressions leave deep imprints on their subconscious mind. Not only his studies, behavior would get adversely affected, but his growth would also get retarded. Psychological approach to a child’s changed behavior is all the more necessary. Children of elite class suffer more due to neglect than those of poor families, despite the fact that the former have plenty of vast and varied avenues to develop their talent.

Filed Under: Babies and Baby Care, Family Health and Safety Tagged With: , ,
by on February 15, 2012 Leave a Comment

how to get rid of problems in life?

There is hardly any country where there are no job- related problems. When a constructive and conciliatory approach is adopted, problems get solved but- a sustained, sincere and honest effort has to come forth from the sufferer himself. There is said to be a custom among the Dutch that while entering their houses, they leaves their shoes outside the entry door. It simply implies that when you return your home; leave the official problems outside your home as you leave your shoes out. When cares and worries of office are brought to home, family peace is liable to get disturbed and when family’s problems are carried to office, official performance is bound to suffer. An attempt should always he made to keep your home and office free from each other’s problems. I know the case of a senior executive who had strictly directed his family members not to disturb him while he was in the office and had similarly instructed his office staff not to disturb him with while he was at his home, of course the latitude for being informal, either at home or office, was allowed for emergent problems only. If official business and family problems are segregated efficiently, without sacrificing interest of one for the other, stress can be avoided. Too much work or too much leisure and rest can turn turtle your apple cart of life. Work when you work, enjoy while you enjoy is a golden principle which needs to be sermonized. If you are feeling mentally chocked or are not able to find a way out, it is advisable to look out for a job where work culture and conditions of service are better. But, job at hand must not be given up until a better alternative is available, otherwise you and your family may have to encounter a financial ruin. Remember, a bird in hand is worth two in the bush. Is there any guarantee that the new assignment would be better than the one at hand? It could be the other way round also. Change ought to be for the better and never for the worse. So, learn to remain satisfied with your present lot, though efforts to find a better alternative must continue unabated.
The Americans, like many others, like the ‘Get goers’ but not the ‘Stickers’. The ‘get goers’ are liked because they know how to compromise with their lot whereas the ‘stickers’ all abhorred as they fail to adapt themselves in a given situation. Flexibility and adaptability are admittedly good and praised qualities of any worker whereas rigidity and stickiness are the minus points of any worker. It is not the personal appearance that endears a person to others, it is the quantum of efficient performance and work output that rate a person high. These norms equally apply in a family also. Striking an efficient balance, without sacrificing interests of either office or family, is the measuring rod to determine grit and determination of any person. You cannot blow hot and cold in the same breath. Learn how to compromise with variable habits and attitudes of your colleagues and family members. Bowing to the orders of your senior is your compulsion but to act friendly with your colleagues ought to be an impulsive act. You cannot treat your family members in the way you treat your subordinate and vice verse. In order to seek or expect help from others, you have to first learn low to help others so as to induce them to help you when you need their help. Study a standard work of some famous author to learn the art of staying cheerful while at work.

Filed Under: Self Improvement, Teens Tagged With: , , ,
by on February 14, 2012 Leave a Comment

drug misuse and addiction

This is a serious problem having worldwide network of operations. It is not that drug peddlers are drug users also. Quick buck seems to be the alluring factor that attracts people from all regions, groups, ages, sexes. Here, the subject is being dealt with in relation to stress, caused by non-consumption of drugs, in availability and withdrawal symptoms and ramification. Following drugs may be referred to as causing drug misuse
1. Cannabia Sativa (known also simply as Cannabis)
2. Barbiturates
3. Opiates : of which codem, heroine and Morphine form major bulk of drugs under this heading.
4. Benzodiazepines.
5. Cocaine
6. Hallucinogenic Drugs (known as LSD also)
7. Athphetamines
8. Organic Solvents
9. Tobacco (smoking, chewing, snuffing etc.)
Since the element of dependence is a prime factor, and when dependence assumes acute form, it is not possible to withdraw or reduce the quantity of drug intake. Most of the social factors, coupled, with a (pseudo) feeling of getting a ‘kick’ or an ‘Ecstasy state, hilarity and temporary relief from cares, worries and anxieties of day-to-day activities are said to be contributory factors in pushing the drug-addicts to a point of no-return. Most of the adolescent crimes, sometimes of previous nature also are attributed to drug habit. The more the attempt to wriggle out of habit, the more the involvement is noticed.
Opium, addiction was a common habit of the ‘Yellow Race’ and took them a lot of time and effort to educate, motivate and guide their youth, even elderly people, to see reason and abstain from use thereof. There is hardly any race or nation in this world which can boast of having eradicated this social disorder, and strict law enforcement measures have yielded simply minimal results. Drug trade is more profitable, though quite risky, to organized gangs, leaders and perpetrators. Element of risk, in being nabbed and punished, is inconsistent with huge margin of profit and easy money.
Instant and immense gains, quick disposal and acquisition seem to be the guiding, motivating and ‘pushup’ factors which do not show any declining trend. Nexus and unholy alliance and understanding between some law- enforcing agencies, criminals and political power. Citadels have (commonly known as Political bureaucratic and criminal Nexus) all vested interests. Moreover, easy availability of users also is responsible for this malady. Student community is the vulnerable area where this trade blossoms. The problem gets complexed and serious when juveniles are induced to drug use — when the poor and less privileged and immature persons are funded by the unscrupulous and wayward elite children. When the rich children succeed in cultivating drug addiction amongst the poor community, they are compelled to commit pilferage, theft, dacoities, robberies, way-lay innocent but rich people, resort to other crimes in order to create money for the ‘benefactors’ who feed them back with some money to meet their drug-demands.
Ethological factors in alcohol and drug use are quite common. Some unscrupulous and avaricious doctors do not hesitate to prescribe drugs to their economically potent customers (though not patients). Prescription and resultant hefty sale of a legally banned drug (Mendrex) is a classical example in this connection. When even short acting drugs are over prescribed for longer periods, drug-dependence is the only outcome.
Symptoms and Complications of Drug-Misuse
(Common Symptoms)
1. Permanent dependence.
2. Difficulty in giving up the drug
3. Abrupt stoppage leading to family and social problems also, apart from social withdrawal and disturbed pattern of family life which has stressful effects on the users and their family members
4. Epileptic Fits
5. Loss of natural power to relax, enjoy and participate
6. Psychotic episodes and confusional states
7. Slothfulness and lack of motivation and initiative
8. HIV Infection
9. Intense craving and fear of impending death
10. Bacterial infections. Hepatitis-B
11. Accidental intake of overdose
12. Depression, anxiety, fatigue, general malaise and feeling of ‘out of sorts’, worthlessness
13. Hallucinations (Visual or relating to hearing)
14. Loss of sense of proportion, time, place, action and response
15. Impotency and infertility, sex withdrawal or else excessive indulgence
17. Speech and mood disorders
It is not that all the aforesaid symptoms are the last word or that all addicts suffer from all such symptoms. In addition, there could be other unspecified symptoms that may be peculiar to an individual addict.

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